Religious Jokes

Posted on June 30, 2008
Filed Under Jokes, Nonsense, WTF? |

Catholic

SITTING BEHIND A COUPLE OF NUNS (WHOSE HABITS PARTIALLY BLOCKED THEIR VIEW) AT A Detroit Red Wing Hockey GAME, THREE MEN DECIDED TO BADGER THE NUNS IN AN EFFORT TO GET THEM TO MOVE.

IN A VERY LOUD VOICE, THE FIRST GUY SAID, “I THINK I’M GOING TO MOVE TO UTAH, THERE ARE ONLY 100 NUNS LIVING THERE.”

THE SECOND GUY SPOKE UP AND SAID, “I WANT TO GO TO MONTANA, THERE ARE ONLY 5O NUNS LIVING THERE.”

THE THIRD GUY SAID, “I WANT TO GO TO IDAHO, THERE ARE ONLY 25 NUNS LIVING THERE

ONE OF THE NUNS TURNED AROUND, LOOKED AT THE MEN, AND IN A VERY SWEET, CALM VOICE SAID, “WHY DON’T YOU GO TO HELL THERE AREN’T ANY NUNS THERE.”

Muslim

Guy goes in an adult store and asks for an inflatable sex doll.
Guy behind the counter says, ‘Male or female?’
Customer says, ‘Female’
Counter guy asks, ‘Black or white?’
Customer says, ‘White’
Counter guy asks, ‘Christian or Muslim?’
Customer says, ‘What the hell does religion have to do with it?’
Counter guy says, ‘The Muslim one blows itself up’.

Jewish (Catholic too)

A rabbi and a priest are standing at a bus stop when a 9 year old boy runs across the street in front of them.

Say’s the priest to the rabbi “I’d love to screw that!”

To which the rabbi promptly asks “Out of what?”