Posts Tagged ‘joke’
Some people shouldn’t be allowed to get married, have children or vote!
This was this guy's first boat and he was taking it to the lake, but he wasn't quite sure of the correct procedure for launching a boat off a ramp. However, he figured it couldn't be that difficult to do, so he stopped by his local Union office for advice, and they just told him... "Don't let the trailer get too deep in the water when [...]
Husband Store
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose [...]
Harley the dog!
My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day. He has his food prepared for him. He can eat whenever he wants, 24/7/365. His meals are provided at no cost to him. He visits the vet once a year for his checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this he pays nothing, and nothing is required of him. He lives in a nice [...]
Sexual harrassment?
This in from one of our favorite readers, Cheers! Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air, and tells her that her hair smells nice. After a week of this, she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and asks to file a sexual [...]
DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: Innovative Preliminary Proliferation Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: Specificity Anti-constitutionalistically Passive-aggressive disorder Transubstantiate THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: No thanks, I'm [...]
Joke – Poolside Entertainment
A rich man living in Dallas decided to throw a party and invited all of his friends and neighbors.He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion. Everyone was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating prawns, oysters and BBQ and flirting. At the height of the party, the host said, "I have a 15ft man-eating crocodile in my [...]
Jerk on a Plane…
If you are sitting next to someone who irritates you on a plane or train follow these instructions: 1. Quietly and calmly open up your laptop case. 2. Remove your laptop. 3. Start it up 4. Make sure the guy who is annoying you, can see the screen. 5. Close your eyes, tilt your head up to the sky, move your lips and kind of mumble some [...]
